Who's the Brains of This Operation?

By that I do not mean the show, but moving the plot along. This totally is not my way of getting out of listing all the cast and crew. Let's start with our main cast vampires:

Nicholas "Nick" Knight (played by Geraint Wyn Davies):  Our main protagonist is an eight century old vampire, which given that Davies was about 35 when the show started filming in 1992, making Nick that age in 1228, that's dead accurate. We love accuracy but do not get used to it. It will fly out the window very soon. Nick is French in origin, like the rest of the vampire trio. He has changed his identity several times in order to keep his secret, spending time around the world in a timeline that is neither humanly nor vampirely possible. Nick Knight is his newest persona living in Toronto, Ontario as a homicide detective for the 27th District of the Metropolitan Police Department.

(I turn 35 in three months and if I want to look this good, I need to drink a lot more blood.)

Janette DuCharme (played by Deborah Duchêne): I had to look up Janette's last name because if the show did say it, it was within a conversation in French. French and I do not get along. Janette was turned before Nick and has rendezvous with him in Toronto. Nick and Janette used to be lovers. I do not know if they still are a couple or that vampires are DTF all the time. One kiss from Nick can make her knees weak. I cannot blame her. As an 11 year old, I was not into guys three times my age with 80s hair. I have since turned into the slut I was born to be and dat ass. Janette owns The Raven, a nightclub for vampires and humans but the humans do not know that some of the customers are vampires? Janette is ride-or-die with other females, mortal or otherwise.

Lucien LaCroix (played by Nigel Bennett): Was I the only person who grew up pronouncing this name like "la-CROY"? This was decades before the drink came out as well. The show uses "la-CROY" and "la-CRAW". Not that it matters, because whenever someone mentions "that asshole", they are probably talking about LaCroix. If someone shoved Senator Palpatine and Caesar Romero's Joker into the Hadron Collider and then showed the leftover goo a mirror, it would stand up straight and call itself LaCroix. He sired Nick and Janette, so they are never rid of him. Nothing good ever comes from this character, which would make sense as he is the "mwahahaha" villain of the show. He demonstrates how human-like Nick is compared to his own bloodthirst and boner for chaos.

Now for our humans:

Dr. Natalie Lambert (played by Catherine Disher): Metro PD's resident medical examiner. Natalie is the only human who knows that Nick and Janette are vampires. She is helping Nick find a cure for vampirism and also protects him from their employer's suspicions. She has the hots for him because that is how television works, but that is about as media-portrayed-female as she gets. She is woman of science with a childlike curiosity. With the amount of time she spends in the field thwarting bad guys with Nick, I'm surprised she gets any work done in the morgue. But it's Canada. How many murders can there be?

Detective Don Schanke (played by John Kapelos):  He pronounces his last name "S-KANG-ki" instead of the traditional German "Sh-AWNG-kuh". There has to be a law somewhere against allowing your children to grow up with the worst pronunciation of their last name. Schanke is Nick's partner against crime (see what I did there? Es joke, laugh!). He's fat, balding, full of bad habits, and slightly sexist. Yet I cannot deny he is mostly a sweetheart who pulls his weight as a cop. He is a character you root for despite his flaws.

 These are our main five. I will introduce others as they appear in each episode.